Because I'm Worth It

(Original Post - 2016)
​“Because I’m worth it.” Four simple words that took L’Oréal Paris into the forefront of the 70’s feminist movement. It captured the spirit of the time and resonated deeply with women. It wasn’t just about selling products; it was about empowerment and self-worth. Even today, it’s remarkable how those four simple words continue to inspire confidence and self-assurance. It is a testament to a well-crafted message that taps into something universal!  Back then, the slogan brought a voice to women. Women everywhere were saying, “Damn right, I’m worth it!”
The commercial I remember most was in 1979 with Meredith Baxter Birney for L’Oréal Preference Hair Color. She had beautiful, thick, soft, flowing hair. She said, “It looks like as if it feels like silk.” If you don’t quite remember the commercial here’s a link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmcCiB17TOk
I was nine years old and I remember being so mesmerized by her hair and her beauty. But what I remember most about the commercial was my mom’s reaction. While many women looked at this as an anthem to feminine pride, my Mom’s reaction and explanation to me was that the commercial showed the actress as self-centered and conceited. “It wasn’t lady-like” was possibly the phrase she used. My mom’s reaction reflected the polarity of the time. Femininity during that time, and for generations before, emphasized humility and modesty. The idea of openly declaring one’s worth in the 70s still seemed unconventional for some.
For the record, I asked my mom to recall her reaction to the commercial before I started writing this piece (in 2016). To both of our surprise, she didn’t remember it that way at all. She remembered that she liked the idea that it was okay to want to look better. My Mom has always embraced her own sense of style. She is an artist; an Interior Designer and she owned a women’s clothing store. She has a creative spirit and that has always been reflected in how she dresses. She wore hats to church and had an awesome olive green “pleather” suit that I thought was so cool that I begged her to wear the jacket to a concert when I was 15. Her appreciation for wanting to look her best, I think, was more aligned with the spirit of empowerment and self-care that the slogan embodies.
It is remarkable how our memories differ and have evolved over time. When my mom told me how she remembered the commercial, I explained to her how I remembered her reaction. She wrote me back in an email and said, “You’re right, I think I did feel that way.”
This commercial and what I perceived as my mom’s reaction was a very mixed message. I was having challenges finding balance between expressing myself authentically while adhering to expectations and fitting in. I appreciated the beauty and style that my mom introduced to me, but I also wanted to dress as my lifestyle dictated, like a tomboy.  
In adolescence, I believe we all grapple with the quest for identity. The pressure to fit in and conform to societal norms can lead to creating patterns and behaviors that might not align with our true self. A false sense of self coupled with the desire to fit in begins the cycle of conforming and people pleasing.   
Deep down I knew I was worth it, but I had created a pattern of people pleasing. That is how I measured my worth. Shifting my perspective came many years later and I’m still learning to embrace it. Honestly, it came in waves. A shedding of layers over time, and a reclaiming my authentic self. And sometimes, it still feels selfish. To show that I believe I am worth it. To be perfectly content with the fact that I enjoy the simplicity of my life. And that I don’t have to measure up to anyone else’s standards except God’s and mine! This is a daily practice in EVERY AREA OF MY LIFE. My survival instincts are often to go back to appeasing others even when it doesn’t feel natural, just because it would be easier. Saying NO, setting boundaries and making my own way, is a newly learned skill that I’ve not 100% mastered. But I am willing to learn and make mistakes for the sake of my true self! A journey of self-discovery and self-acceptance, sometimes challenging and uncomfortable, is liberation. And it is never too late to start shedding the layers, to reconnect with the core of who we are and live a life with great purpose.
“Because I’m Worth It!”
“Tuck the Fringe”