The Day I Broke Open

What is your breaking point moment?
We all have one.
The moment when the pain of staying where you are becomes greater than the fear of what’s ahead.
The moment when you stop Googling for answers because your soul knows:
It’s time to move.

June 17, 2019
I will never forget it.
I was on my knees. Praying. Sobbing.
God, please give me the courage. I don’t know how to pick myself up and walk out that door. I don’t know how to take the first step to save my SELF. I know it will be hard. But I also know that if I stay, I will slowly die from the inside out. I can already feel it happening, and I know that you created me for more.
– Journal entry 6/17/2019
An hour later, I received the gift of clarity I needed.
I walked out the door.
And never looked back.

Breaking open hurts.
But that day marked the beginning.
I didn’t know it then, but God had already been preparing me.
Aligning me. Whispering into my spirit.
I didn’t have the answers, but I had trust.
I didn’t feel strong, but I had faith.
Looking back now, I can see how my need to feel valued and loved had twisted into patterns of control.
Managing outcomes. Managing people.
All in an attempt to not feel abandoned.
But that wasn’t life. That was survival.
And my spirit was dying.
That day was my resurrection.

Six Years
It’s not lost on me that TODAY is exactly six years from that moment.
And today, I board a plane to Europe to walk the Camino de Santiago pilgrimage in Spain.
Another kind of prayer.
Another breaking open.
So much has happened—grief and grace, highs and heartbreaks.
And I wouldn’t change a thing.
Because that hard floor—the one where I sobbed and surrendered—was sacred ground.
It was the moment that saved my life.
To go backwards, to revert in any way, would be to reject the very grace that carried me through.
I honor that moment.
And I intend to live like it mattered.
We all have that moment.
It might come through heartbreak—a breakup, a diagnosis, the loss of someone you love.
Or it might arrive wrapped in joy, like the birth of a long-held dream.
But you’ll know it by how it feels.
Like everything stops.
And everything begins.
All at once.
It’s not the end.
It’s the beginning.

So again, I ask you:
What is your breaking point moment?
And what did you do with it?
Because the moment may break you open…
but that’s where the light gets in.​